I flood my apartment to prove I am beyond God’s dominion – Sarah Lyons-Lin

i.
the first day after you i wanted to hang
pictures of only myself.  to cover the walls
i found myself in everyone: their twisted bodies,
joints angled as whitecapped waves.
the ways their hands worshipped what they touched.
when i looked at you it was like facing the dark
of the ocean.  unfocused movement.

the first day i wanted to hang pictures
of only myself.  tape flaking from wall like fish scales.
everything i loved left now in one place.

ii.
if you and i were still in love we might have had a child
who would have asked why she was named
after a jellyfish.  i would have taught her
how to paralyze prey.  i would have taught
her that word: paralysis: to be so filled with madness
that movement is impossible.  i would have
taught her to reproduce asexually,
to divide and divide and divide and divide—
small cell, small blood clot, small madness.
i would have let her be free of organs
like brain and heart.

Sarah Lyons-Lin works as a braillist and loves the Midwest. Her work is forthcoming or has previously appeared in Rust+MothStorm CellarCherry Tree, and Art House America. Her handmade chapbook lectio divina for reborn things was published in winter 2018.

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